News · Press Release

Timid Tom Kean Jr. Won’t Say Who He Voted For To Be The Next Speaker

It’s a day that ends in Y, which means Tom Kean Jr. is hiding from reporters (sometimes by running into a Capitol elevator), refusing to say who he voted for to be Republicans’ next Speaker of the House.

According to the New Jersey Globe, “Since it was conducted by secret ballot, Kean’s vote may never be definitively known.” However, what we do know is that he either voted for an extremist who’s described himself as “David Duke without the baggage” or an extremist who is best known for not doing anything about “rampant sexual abuse” as OSU’s assistant wrestling coach.

DCCC Spokesperson Aidan Johnson

“Spooky season is around the corner and Tom Kean Jr. is going as a ghost again. Rumor has it he floats around haunting the Capitol Hill hallways but no one has seen or heard from him since he was elected. Voters in New Jersey are sick and tired of having a representative who is scared of his own shadow.”

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